BlueApricot

Some conflict is inevitable when two or more people work together: misunderstandings can emerge from different personalities or styles; different opinions; ego or turf battles; and miscommunication. Some people can be moody, bitchy or outright mean: we have our good and our bad days!

Few teams bother with establishing internal rules for how conflict can be addressed in a healthy and constructive manner. The result, often exacerbated by a leader who shies away from conflict management, is festering resentment or worse. I know of teams where individuals give each other the silent treatment or attack one another at the drop of a hat. Unresolved conflict kicks in coping mechanisms ranging from venting to evading. The source of conflict gets stuffed under the proverbial carpet, in some cases for months, if not years.

What does conflict avoidance do to teamwork? A team does not function properly (there will inevitably be denial about that, too!): conflict sucks energy from a team like a sponge. People will react differently to the situation often making things worse. A team can become completely divided adversely impacting productivity, knowledge and information sharing, communication etc The focus can shift from important goals to scoring points, ‘saving face’ and other inappropriate behavior.

Instead of tolerating energy sponges, teams should have in place agreements on how conflict will be raised and discussed – prior agreements creates expectations and a safe container to allow difficult issues to be tackled by team members. Instead of jumping to conclusions and making things worse, teams should commit to finding out what can be learned from the conflict and how the learning can be applied to increase trust, mutual support and performance. In other words, conflict offers a great opportunity to take a team to a whole new level – to everyone’s satisfaction.

Bottom line: Embrace conflict, don’t stifle it!